The series is called How to Measure Success.
Each week we will look at a different area of life, fitness, money, relationships, and business, and ask a question that sounds simple but goes surprisingly deep:
How do you actually know when you are winning?
We will start today with Success in Financial Goals. And I want to begin with a confession.
The Promise I Made at Dinner
Cast your mind back to one of those end-of-year dinners. The kind where everyone is feeling hopeful and a little bold about what the new year will bring.
That was the night I made a promise I was not fully prepared to keep.
I was sitting around a table with friends. The food was good, the energy was high, and the conversation had turned to goals for the year ahead. You know how those evenings go. Someone mentions a goal. Then someone else shares one. Then suddenly everyone is making declarations like they are signing official documents.
When the conversation turned to fitness, something came over me. Maybe it was the excitement in the room. Maybe it was the confidence that comes from a good meal. But before I had even thought it through properly, I heard myself say the words out loud:
“I want to have a six pack by the middle of the year.”
The table erupted. People cheered. Someone may have even clapped.
I smiled and nodded like a man who had just made a very reasonable commitment.
I had not thought this through at all.
Six Months Later
The middle of the year arrived.
I can report, with full transparency and just a little bit of humor, that the six pack did not arrive with it. I did not even manage one pack per month. The mathematics simply did not work in my favor.
And if you had asked me back in January how I would feel about that moment, I would have told you I would feel like a failure.
But here is the thing.
When I sat down to reflect on those six months honestly, I did not feel like a failure at all.
In fact, I felt something much closer to pride. And understanding why I felt that way is exactly what this entire series is about.
What Actually Happened
While I was chasing the six pack that never came, something else was quietly happening on the inside.
Over those six months, I started paying real attention to what I eat. Not obsessively, but intentionally. I began asking myself questions before meals that I had never asked before. I learned more about what my body actually needs as opposed to what I simply felt like eating in the moment.
I also kept showing up to work out, even on the days I did not feel like it. Especially on those days, actually. There were mornings when every part of me wanted to stay in bed. I got up anyway. Not because I was naturally disciplined, but because I had made a commitment, and I was choosing to honor it even in small ways.
None of that gave me a six pack. But all of it made me genuinely healthier, more energetic, and more consistent than I had been in years.
And here is the question I want to sit with you on for a moment.
Which one is the real success?
The Problem With Measuring Only the Finish Line
We have been taught to measure success in a very specific way.
You set a goal. You either reach it or you do not. If you reach it, you succeeded. If you do not, you failed.
It is clean. It is simple. And for a lot of things in life, it works perfectly well.
But for the goals that matter most, the ones that require us to change our habits, our thinking, and our daily choices, that single measurement misses almost everything important.
Here is what I have come to believe.
The goal is what gets you started. But the journey is what actually changes you.
That six pack goal got me out of bed on cold mornings. It got me paying attention to my meals. It got me building habits I had been putting off for years. The goal did its job beautifully, even though I never crossed the finish line it pointed toward.
The destination matters. But the person you become on the way there matters even more.
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What Real Fitness Success Can Look Like
Success in fitness is not always the number on the scale or the reflection in the mirror, though those things matter too.
Sometimes success looks like choosing a salad when you really wanted something fried, and not resenting it.
Sometimes it looks like finishing a workout you almost skipped.
Sometimes it looks like sleeping better, moving more easily, or simply feeling more at home in your own body.
These things do not always show up in before and after photos. But they are real. They are yours. And they deserve to be recognized as the victories they are.
Coming Up in This Series
Next Saturday, we move to the second part of this series: Success in Financial Goals.
If you have ever set a money goal and felt like you came up short, I think you are going to find next week’s newsletter very encouraging. There is a lot more happening in your financial life than your bank balance alone can show you.
Until then, take good care of yourself.
The goal got you started. Do not forget to celebrate what the journey already built in you.
Tom