How to Lead Across Teams Without Being in Charge
I have something special to share with you about one of the most important skills you can develop – Leading a team.
Leading a team
You can lead teams in many different places, at your job, in your church, or in your neighborhood group. The beautiful thing about leadership is that the same good habits work everywhere. Sometimes you will lead volunteers who choose to help because they want to, not because they have to. Leading volunteers can be harder because you cannot tell them what to do like a boss would. Instead, you have to inspire them and make them want to help.
My team leadership experience
Let me tell you about the first time I led a team outside of my family.
I was a regular university student, trying to balance classes and life, when some people came to me with an exciting but scary challenge. They wanted me to start a brand new fellowship group on our campus something that had never existed there before.
A fellowship is like a special gathering where students come together to learn, grow, and support each other. But here is the thing, I would be starting from zero. No building, no members, no reputation, no nothing. Just me and a big dream.
When they first asked me, I felt a mix of excitement and terror. My heart started beating fast, and all these worried thoughts began flooding my mind like a river. “What if I mess this up? What if nobody comes? What if people think I am not good enough?” I kept thinking over and over, “Can I really do this?”
The hardest part was that I could not use the usual things leaders often rely on. I could not use my age to command respect because many of the students were the same age as me, and some were even older. I could not wave around my achievements because we were all in the same classes, getting similar grades, facing the same struggles.
I felt like David facing Goliath, but without even a slingshot. All I had were the leadership lessons I had learned from watching my family and from my own personal experiences. I had to trust that these simple lessons would somehow be enough to help me lead people who did not have to follow me.
Leadership moment
The beginning was like magic. When we first started our fellowship, you could feel the excitement in the air. Everyone was buzzing with energy and big dreams. People showed up early to meetings, stayed late to talk, and volunteered for everything. It felt like we were part of something special that was going to change our campus forever.
But then reality hit like a cold splash of water.
After about three weeks, the shine started wearing off. School assignments got harder and deadlines started piling up like mountains. Slowly, I began to notice changes that made my stomach sink. The meetings that used to be packed started having empty chairs. People who promised to help with important tasks began saying, “Sorry, I forgot” or “I was too busy.”
One evening, I sat in our meeting room looking at half the chairs empty, and it felt like watching a balloon slowly losing air. The excitement was fading, and I could see our dream slipping away right before my eyes.
That night, I went back to my room and had a long, hard conversation with myself. I remembered something I had learned: “Everything rises and falls on leadership.” This meant that if our fellowship was struggling, I needed to look in the mirror first. I was the leader, so the responsibility was mine.
I realized I had been leading like I was the boss of a company, trying to manage tasks and organize events. But these were volunteers who chose to be there. They did not need another person telling them what to do, they needed someone who truly cared about them as people.
That was my turning point. I decided I had to change my approach completely, and here are the three game-changing lessons I learned:
You lead a team by leading each person
I learned that a team is made of many different people, and to lead the whole team well, I needed to connect with each person one by one and find ways to help them grow.
Character over skills
The team cared more about who I was as a person than what I could do, they watched to see if I actually did the good things I talked about.
Showing up
I realized that if I showed up for people when they needed me most, they would know I truly cared about them as people, not just for what they could do for me.
These three lessons changed everything. Our fellowship grew stronger, and people started coming back to meetings. More importantly, I learned that leadership is really about loving and serving the people you lead.
Action Point
- This week, pick one person on your team (at work, church, or in your community) and find one specific way to show up for them. It could be remembering something important to them, helping them with a problem, or simply asking how they are doing and really listening to their answer. Leadership starts with caring for one person at a time.
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